What Do You Do with the Mad that You Feel?
#1901
Fred Rogers was an American television host and author of a preschool television series titled Mister Rogers' Neighborhood, which ran from 1968 to 2001.
"What do you do with the mad that you feel?" is a song he wrote and sang in 1968 to talk about emotions and how to deal with them. During a hearing at the Senate in 1969, Rogers said that the inspiration for the song came from a question he received from a concerned boy, who asked, "What do you do with the mad that you feel when you feel so mad you could bite?"
Using his words, this song "has to do with that good feeling of control which I feel that the children need to know is there."
Watching Rogers reciting the lyrics of this song, I started thinking about how I process feelings and emotions. I remember, as a child, being told not to be angry, upset, or sad. When indeed, I was, and I couldn't help. I just needed to learn better ways to process, use, and maybe transform those emotions into something creative.
It's the same in our adult lives. How often do you feel guilty because you judge someone? Or because you get upset about something? Yet, the reaction should not be to suppress those emotions but to learn from them and use them, maybe creatively.
I'll close with Rogers' simple and profound lyrics that remind us that we can do something else with the mad we feel. It's for kids, I know, but I believe a lot of us grown-ups need these words, too.
What do you do with the mad that you feel
When you feel so mad you could bite?
When the whole wide world seems oh, so wrong...
And nothing you do seems very right?
What do you do? Do you punch a bag?
Do you pound some clay or some dough?
Do you round up friends for a game of tag?
Or see how fast you go?
It's great to be able to stop
When you've planned a thing that's wrong,
And be able to do something else instead
And think this song:
I can stop when I want to
Can stop when I wish
I can stop, stop, stop any time.
And what a good feeling to feel like this
And know that the feeling is really mine.
Know that there's something deep inside
That helps us become what we can.
For a girl can be someday a woman
And a boy can be someday a man.