One Apple A Day #362
I am doing a small experiment on myself.
In the last weeks, I have been struggling to be fully present in whatever I am doing.
I am tired, low on energy and the hot weather doesn’t help.
But what annoys me the most, is that I am not fully present even when I am supposed to have fun and relax. I’m taking some time off to enjoy the beach, and my mind wanders among whole the things I should have already done and instead are still on the todo list.
With the help of my coach, I realised that guilt plays a big part in keeping me in this negative loop. I can’t rest my mind because I feel guilty for not doing enough. I can’t entirely focus when I’m working because I’m not giving enough space to my mind to rest.
As a result, I’ve been dragging my days without making significant progress until I realised it was time to change something.
So, this week I’m doing a small experiment.
Every morning, instead of jotting down the list of thing I have to do for my projects, I defined all the way I will take my mind off things. And the day would not be completed if I don’t do all of them.
Like today I want to read 2 hours a novel I just bought. And then I’ll take a walk. And I want to watch a movie.
Once all the recovery tasks are completed, in the spare time I will tackle my long to-do list following the inspiration of the moment.
I know, it sounds a bit crazy and it is. It’s pushing my relationship with my sense of guilt to the limit. But I needed to do something, and I love to experiment and play.
So, here I am.
So far it hasn’t improved much my productivity, but I managed to go back to reading with consistency, and I feel some creative energy flowing in.