One Apple A Day #243
Change. How often do you hear this word?
At some point in life, everyone wants to change something.
Job, location, car, house, partner, themselves. You name it.
Though, change is not an easy thing to do.
There two forces at play anytime we want to change something in our life.
On one side there is the desire to change, the excitement of the possible, the fascination of the unknown, the attraction of the new.
On the other the resistance of our existing situation, the ease of the known, the comfort of the predictable.
Those two forces are always at play, and the success or failure in changing depends on them. Which is the stronger?
In my experience, change can be triggered in two ways. From outside, when something disruptive happens to our life we are forced to change. If we are fired, we have to find a new job. If we have a car accident, we have to buy a new car. If we go through a painful personal issue, we are forced to change ourselves. The problem with changes triggered from outside is that we are not in control. We are reacting, pulled outside our comfort zone by external forces. It may be painful because the balance between the two forces (desire vs resistance) is changed by weakening the resistance and not by reinforcing the desire.
The other trigger is the one that comes from inside. It is the result of connecting with our inner values and purpose, reinforcing our desire to change. It is the product of self-awareness. This type of change acknowledges the resistance while nurturing and strengthening the desire to change.