One Apple A Day #1142
Lately, I've struggled with this morning's practice.
So much is happening, inside and outside, that it's hard to protect this space. So much so that even my computer crashed after I wrote these first lines.
Yet, these are the times when I need this space even more. The blank page, the sound of my fingers tapping on the keyboard, the black letters appearing on the screen before me. It is soothing. But it also helps me process what is going on and release it.
Right now, I can feel my emotions twisting and churning in my belly and chest. Guilt, fear, excitement, trepidation, pain and many more. They are all melting together in one big knot.
Am I where I should be? With whom I should be?
Will I be able to rise to the expectations? Am I prepared enough? And what about the world and its struggles; am I really playing my part, or am I just hiding in my own stuff?
It may seem weird to talk about my struggles in a public space like this. Yet, I can't think of a safer space to let them go than this small white space.