Is it worth it?
Do you ever ask this question?
Maybe when you read the news or observe the reality around you. Or perhaps you ask it yourself when you are experiencing pain or struggles.
I do. Often without even knowing it consciously.
I've been pondering a lot on this question in the last few days. At a dinner with some dear friends, we talked about the lives of incredibly talented and equally incredibly troubled artists like Van Gogh and Modigliani.
And the question came up.
Was it worth it?
Sure, now the whole world celebrates their greatness, but they experience way more suffering than glory in their lifetime.
Was it worth it?
I genuinely don't know.
What I know is that no one can answer that question for anyone else.
In the end, it is a question about meaning, and I believe there is no universal meaning. As Viktor Frankl wrote, "the meaning of life, differ from man to man, and from moment to moment. Thus it is impossible to define the meaning of life in a general way."
So, I can't answer for Van Gogh or Modigliani. I can't answer for anyone but me. I'm the one who is asked by life if it is worth it.
Depending on my awareness when I'm asked, my answer may differ.