Whatever we say or do serves a purpose: it is an attempt to fulfil our needs. Often, at an unconscious level, nevertheless, these needs drive our choices, words and actions. This is what late psychologist, conflict mediator, and creator of nonviolent communication Marshall Rosenberg proposed.
Yesterday, I was in a beautiful conversation about how to talk with people who have gone down the rabbit hole of some unhealthy conspiracy theory. We agree that there is no point in arguing. That may work when we discuss facts, but when the conversation slips into the realm of beliefs, we may quickly find ourselves engaged in what Dave Grey called "a battle for the obvious."
A battle that is not worth fighting.
Then, my friend Ian suggested we ask what they are getting out of it. Going down some rabbit holes must serve a purpose in the life of those who decide to enter in the first place. That reminded me of Rosenberg's idea that everything we do is an attempt to fulfil a need, so I wrote the question in the title: How does it serve you?
The thing you're saying or doing, how does it serve you?
I may need to ask myself this question on a few things that may not serve me at all.