I am back; from this first sentence, I can already see a significant difference in my process. Believe it or not, it took me more than three minutes to write these first few words.
Like I've been doing for the last five years, I sat with my laptop every morning and wrote for fifteen minutes.
The only difference is that for the last ten days, I've only been writing for my eyes. I didn't publish the output of my practice as usual.
And this made all the difference in the world.
As much as I'd love to think that knowing someone will read what I write doesn't affect me, it does.
Words begin to flow immediately if I know I'm not sharing what I write. It's incredible how much I can write in fifteen minutes.
This is one of the objectives of this practice. To be able to enter a bubble where words just flow without any worries about what will happen once they are out there.
I don't know if and when I'll get there. In the past, I experienced that bubble a few times in my practice, which is an incredible feeling.
But what is getting in the way?
Maybe the fear of being judged makes me more careful in choosing my words and crafting my sentences. Or perhaps it's the apprehension of exposing too much of what is happening in my head and heart.
Anyway, my fifteen minutes are gone, and it's time for me to publish what I've written.
I just want to finish with a question I'll carry throughout the day: who would I be if I knew no one was watching?
P.S. As you've probably noticed, I decided to change the style of the titles for my posts to make them more recognizable.